Steph Undaunted

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Women Who Rise | Surviving a Stroke at 29

This is Amanda Johnston, and ya'll, her story is powerful. All of these stories are, but her perseverance and determination is unmatched. I'll let her tell her story.

A year and a half ago, I woke up with a headache and loud buzzing in my right ear. I got up to use the restroom and I fell down. My legs weren’t cooperating with me. My right arm wouldn’t work so I couldn't pull myself up off the bed.

It was so strange, the world was spinning like I had drank too much. My head hurt so bad. I reached over for my phone and called the most recent person in my call history. My husband answered, I said “something is wrong” and couldn’t muster more. My husband rushed into the house and found me in the fetal position-he took me to an emergency room once my toddlers were awake. I was told I probably had a viral infection at the ER and was sent home and continued to lay in bed for 4 more days without getting treatment. We went to another ER. After an MRI scan, I was told what was going on. I had a stroke at 29 years old.

After spending some time in the hospital and a rehabilitation hospital, I went to speech & physical therapy. I could see improvement but the progress was slow. While I was thankful to just be alive, I really wanted to be able to use my body to the best of my abilities or what was left of them.

Using the walker, I started taking walks with my husband to just the mailbox. I went for walks around the block with my family while the stroller helped be my "walker". My steps were a constant thought and I got fatigued easily. It was seriously hard work to constantly use these muscles in cohesion with one another, thinking about the next step and deal with uneven ground. I started getting braver each day taking the stroller to the store. I was so proud of that first stroller walk outside of my neighborhood. My tremors make it difficult to do day to day activities and my fine motor skills are still being worked on constantly but with my hands on that stroller I felt in control. I felt like my walking was really improving. I would go outside with my kids almost everyday and just being out there really helped me progress.

I finally got brave and asked my husband to help me load my 1-1/2 year old on my back in the carrier. My son was happy and so was I! We kept practicing loading my son onto my back and we eventually took a walk around the neighborhood. It was slow and steady but I walked without the stroller AND carried my son! I asked if we could try an easy trail that weekend(I knew I would need help and was not allowed to drive yet). We went on that first hike and I carried my son for almost 3 miles! I was on top of the world! I felt unstoppable. I have now tandem carried my toddlers on trails now. I honestly believe that getting outside, being in the dirt, walking on uneven terrain has really helped me.

I have been able to master walking again, but my fine motor skills really lack. I have a hard time writing, applying makeup, picking up small items, cleaning my house(at least really well). I still change diapers with my opposite hand. I will continue to work on this. There may never be a normal to get back to, but I will keep trying to master this new normal.

My husband and I went to Scotland a couple months ago and we were hiking the Quiraing circuit and I just broke down and cried because I didn’t see myself doing all this a year ago. I didn’t know if I was going to live that day I had my stroke, but I did. I’ve been paralyzed with fear, overwhelmed with sadness, and been filled with hope. I overcame it, I struggled through the beginning of rehabilitation, I relied on the kindness of family and friends, and I persevered through the days that I felt like giving up. My greatest joys are found with my family on trails breathing fresh air by the sea, mountains, or desert.

Every time I am walking a new path, time slows down. The crunch of dirt under my shoes, the sweat on my brow, my sore legs and back remind me that I’m here. I’m surrounded by beauty and I’m happy. I’m happy to be alive, I’ll take a little discomfort for that.

We are constantly faced with obstacles, both physically and mentally but by choosing to stay determined in the face of adversity, you can look that obstacle in the eyes and say “not today”.